home cookin’ challenge of 2020

Given my current trajectory, I’m anticipating I’ll be home cookin’ all throughout 2020, so I thought of an interesting challenge for myself. Each month, I’m going to specifically try one recipe I find on WordPress, so I’ll have cooked up a total of 12 different recipes by the end of December 2020. I’m super excited!

Stir fried udon noodles
Broccoli, fried tofu, shrimp fish balls, udon noodles and bok choy

For any food bloggers (or food enthusiasts like me) who are reading, feel free to post a recipe you think I should try and leave a link down below. I’ll definitely check out some of the food bloggers I’m currently following to see if I get inspired.

The recipes I’m specifically looking for are going to be ones I haven’t necessarily tried before, the ingredients aren’t too expensive and aren’t too complicated to make. I’ll post up photographs of my finished creation. I’m excited to bake some desserts, try some new appetizers and discover some great wholesome dinner recipes.

lemon and orange bars

Reasons for doing this:

  • It’s a challenge, so it’ll be interesting to see if I actually complete this!
  • I’m always up for learning new things, so I’m sure there are so many recipes out there that I’ll love and would want to use over and over again.
  • This will keep me motivated to do more home cookin’ in case I lose steam next year and get me to document more like I used to.
  • I want to also showcase some cool WordPress food blogs out here and give them some love!

Feel free to join the home cookin’ challenge of 2020 if you think this is something you’d like to do, too. I’d LOVE to follow and see which recipes you end up choosing each month, as well. I guess I’ll stick this on my homepage, so I don’t forget!

gratitude’s the attitude

I know I’m probably way behind in this game, but one of the things I started doing this year is reflecting daily on the things I’m grateful for and writing it down; aka, a gratitude journal. It literally takes milliseconds to do, but it has helped me massively in just getting in the right attitude for the day.

It doesn’t solve all the problems or issues that come up, but it does force me to be real about life and the bigger picture. There’s always something to be grateful for. At least for me. I can easily appreciate the little things in life—the nice sun shining through my window, watering my flowers and seeing them grow each day, taking a good deep breathe, and cooking a good meal.

Another thing I really value about this reflective exercise is that I can look back on what I’ve been grateful for and they’re different each day. It’s nice to peek into a little bit of my days in the past and know what I positively thought that day.

I hope you’re all well and going for your goals this year. Being more grateful was one of mine, and I hope to continue this all year long.


Day to day, you don’t feel overly happy, but you don’t feel overly sad either. It’s just another day that carries on. And then one of these normal days become unlike the others. There’s a problem. Your partner breaks up with you, your car breaks down or you lose all your money. It’s one of those days. So you think about how it began. Where did it go wrong? The signals start to connect and the lights all shine out of nowhere. And yet, the first time around, it was so easy to pass by them and not even notice their glaring brightness. There were signs of wear and tear; the breaking down of systems and the slow diminishing of resources.

The problem, suddenly, becomes all too clear. But now, every moment that follows that realization is filled with uncertainty. What happens next? What does the future look like now? The days don’t seem as routine anymore. And that’s where uncertainty lives. In-between the obvious and the unknown.

c’est la vie

c’est la vie
is your attitude.
no one matters,
only you.

your carelessness
is poisoning
the good
for your amusing.

i show up anyway
caring more than i should
by putting myself in harm
since no one would.

c’est la vie it is,
i learned from the best
to put myself first,
and screw the rest.

that’s what would happen
if i ever became you.
but i am me,
i am not cruel.

c’est la vie it is,
i learned from the best
to not be that person
& to not make a mess.

the big tree

circle tree
Used the Paint program. I know, I paint like a kid.

I miss the big tree. It used to sit comfortably in the center of the lawn. The picture above does not look like it at all, but it’s the thought that counts, right? I think I didn’t realize how much I loved it until it got knocked down after a big storm. And then just like that, it was gone.

During the summer heat, the leaves would protect us and lower the temperature a good ten degrees or so. We’d frequently get out our chairs to sit and talk under this beloved beauty. I’ve learned to roller skate and play Double Dutch right by it. I’ve seen squirrels climb up and down and I just never imagined it’d ever go away.

I remember how I would look up at it just to see the little spaces the leaves left open and the distance was so far away. Or so it seemed.

It’s been years since it fell. But the yard still seems a bit lonely, even with the two new trees that have grown since then.

No matter how much time has passed, moments like these remind me that we are creatures of habit.

real talk

With truest intentions, you can meet your goals. With realistic vision and energy, you can reach your potential to achieve those goals. 

It’s a new year. There are so many messages out there telling us where to put our money, when to wake-up, how to act and de-stress. I am grateful for all the resources, but it becomes a lot.

So I pause for a moment.

And then I think, “The focus and energy comes from me.” Regardless of my image: the degrees I have, the salary I’ve earned and the places I’ve lived, there needs to be a force that meets all of them to their potential. That’s me. Not anyone else because it’s my life. Two people can grow up with exact circumstances but can still face different challenges and needs.

I would love to achieve all the amazing things that’s ever been achieved, but it’s just not realistic and do I really want to put in all the work to get there?

And it’s not really the goal at all. It starts with the individual. What do I actually want to do? What can I realistically achieve? What are my intentions in achieving these goals? I can’t travel through time. No matter how much I want to, even if it’s my goal, I’ll never be Marty McFly from Back to the Future. But I can do so many other cool things (maybe not as cool as time travel, but you get the point) that I am capable of achieving. What am I willing to commit to it: time, money, convenience? It’s all up to me and my situation. All the incoming messages about how to live a perfect life can be great inspiration, but they are also just messages.

The work begins with me first.

Every week is a new week. I can do this. You can do this.

Just not the same way.

The focus and power is in you, not the goals themselves.  

on the edge

We sat side by side on the edge of some flat rocks as the chill slapped us into reality that it was really effing early. Why are we up? Why are we here to see the rise of the sun as it has a thousand times? And we decided it was because we can.

That’s it. It meaning life, us, human nature, intention or consciousness. We do things because we can and because we have the desire to. However, when fear enters the picture, then that’s a whole other story. A whole new ending can come out of the tale.

So what makes us conquer our fears?

Think about that moment right before you do something you were so scared to do. Anything can happen, right? Maybe you back out. But conquering it means you go through with it. What is that? That instinct?

Maybe the reason we get over our fears is the reason why we do anything at all. It’s because the desire to know is stronger than never knowing; never experiencing. Or, maybe we have to. Like a necessary surgery or sacrifice. Maybe it’s better to go through with it in order to survive or for others to.

It seems that overcoming fear leads to more understanding of the unknown, life and if we think about it, also ourselves.

sweet love

sweet love

I made this from the Paint program. Used the watercolor and marker brush option. I don’t like bubble gum flavor, but I’m assuming this ice-cream would taste like. Maybe cotton candy.

I grew up never having a real sweet tooth. My dentist at the time would wonder why I never had cavities. Then I got to college and I had one vanilla ice-cream cone and then I wanted one the next day. I still don’t consider myself a huge sweets lover, but it’s way cuter drawing an ice-cream cone than a potato chip.

as a kid, I thought that…

  • the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus were real
  • collecting marbles and stickers were fun
  • olives and mushrooms were gross
  • every person I met were good people
  • flying on an airplane was super scary
  • time went by so slowly
  • a baby chicken could hatch from any egg from the refrigerator
  • I was invincible and could never get hurt

I’m curious about other people’s answers. How would you finish this sentence?

As a kid, I thought that…