the big tree

circle tree
Used the Paint program. I know, I paint like a kid.

I miss the big tree. It used to sit comfortably in the center of the lawn. The picture above does not look like it at all, but it’s the thought that counts, right? I think I didn’t realize how much I loved it until it got knocked down after a big storm. And then just like that, it was gone.

During the summer heat, the leaves would protect us and lower the temperature a good ten degrees or so. We’d frequently get out our chairs to sit and talk under this beloved beauty. I’ve learned to roller skate and play Double Dutch right by it. I’ve seen squirrels climb up and down and I just never imagined it’d ever go away.

I remember how I would look up at it just to see the little spaces the leaves left open and the distance was so far away. Or so it seemed.

It’s been years since it fell. But the yard still seems a bit lonely, even with the two new trees that have grown since then.

No matter how much time has passed, moments like these remind me that we are creatures of habit.

sweet love

sweet love

I made this from the Paint program. Used the watercolor and marker brush option. I don’t like bubble gum flavor, but I’m assuming this ice-cream would taste like. Maybe cotton candy.

I grew up never having a real sweet tooth. My dentist at the time would wonder why I never had cavities. Then I got to college and I had one vanilla ice-cream cone and then I wanted one the next day. I still don’t consider myself a huge sweets lover, but it’s way cuter drawing an ice-cream cone than a potato chip.

may our stars align

stars aligni’m listening to some interviews and creating something on Paint – basically relaxing and taking a break. i have some frozen lasagna heating up in the oven and i feel rather lazy and productive at the same time. to be honest, i’m a little worried and nervous about the future so maybe this painting represents a desire for my stars to align. a sign of some positive progress i can rely on. i know it takes a lot of effort on my part, which i am currently working on. hopefully i can get a signal from the universe that what i’m doing and wanting to do makes sense.

have a peaceful day everyone and thanks for visiting my ol’ little blog.


hidden hearts

I have the music so loud that I can’t even hear these words. These words that are being typed. Like a silent film being watched as time passes. Slowly, and ever continuous. There are so many ways in which our hearts sing the very songs we refuse to hear. The very words and beats we need. So I continue hiding the very heart I need. Muting the very sound I need to hear. How many hidden hearts do you see? Are they hidden after all?

hidden hearts

donut reflections

donut reflections

I was making some art on MS Paint and realized, hey, I had a few thoughts. It’s written in the image above, but in case you can’t read it, here’s what I wrote:

everything has become a performance. things aren’t legitimate until there’s a brand name or a label or a degree. it feels staged. like i’m afraid to start anything because of the fear of not knowing what is validated or not. but why even care? i want to write. i want to create things. i want to bake cookies and i want to change the world for the better. i can do those things. you can do those things. we don’t need to be held back by some kind of standard we are trying to uphold or a title we need to define. i am human. you are human. can we just be humans again?

animation love

Animating is time-consuming. It takes a lot of heart and patience to see a project complete. I’ve only animated a couple of times and it is really hard. It is truly a step by step process in every movement that is being created. The difficulty, I think, lies in the patience for the repetitive process, and planning ahead.

In the video above, at the 38 second spot, you see a variety of these animated moving parts. It’s incredible what art we can create through these mediums. Movement speed, physics, geometry, color, and shapes all define this artwork. And then you see animated films and television shows come to life and it is remarkable what they can do.

first comment on youtube

I just got my first ever YouTube comment on a video I made about the calm life in Oahu, Hawaii. What a great surprise on Earth Day! I am so happy about it because it’s a video I made out of complete joy and inspiration for a trip I care so deeply about with full of nature, peace and beauty. The way life is there is so different from the way my life is here. I don’t get to wake up to a serene beach and full sunshine every day. I don’t see peacocks just walking around exploring freely. There isn’t much wildlife where I am at all, really.

And to see a comment means so much because it’s like a sign that this film matters more than just me; even if it’s just one person. So thank you, whoever you are, for making my day. I think this German YouTuber has a channel for decor diys. Check her out, if you’re interested—Deko Ideen mit Flora-Shop

perfection is boring


Feb 14 2012 007

I’m not sure if it’s this new creative kick I’m on, but I sorta find perfection in the media boring lately. The sleekest photograph, the right pose, the smooth edits in video—I don’t feel as though there is anything to be learned or gained anymore. I want to push through the glossy, created beauty and see it for what it is.

This reminds me of an elementary school classmate I had who would consistently and carefully color within the lines in our coloring book every single time and I really wanted to be like that; to be neat and flawless. But now I feel that it’s just too much and I honestly never really succeeded in it. I always, somehow, color outside the lines despite my attempts.

I sometimes think that the way media works is in lows and highs; as many things I guess. Things come in cycles and people are always trying to evolve. But where do these new ideas come from and how, if ever, do they cycle in with the rest of it all? I know that I’ll return back to admiring well-done presentations because there is a craft, an art and a skill to appreciate and admire, but for now, I’m okay with things just being okay; not perfect.

for the love of art | light & color lab

I love art. Art will forever be a part of my livelihood as long as I can afford it, create it and embrace it. In grade school, I never really took art seriously. It was just something I had fun with and the classes at school made me happy. My art teacher from my elementary school is one of my most favorite teachers. Looking back at it now, she truly put a lot of effort, time, and money into these classes. I went to public school and if I am assuming correctly, the school did not have the funds for all the art supplies she provided. She taught my class fabric and basket weaving, clay art, painting, and even music and dance sometimes. I think the clay part was super interesting because it involved shaping, patience and a stove!

A memory I used to cherish so much as a child was when my art teacher went over to me and asked me if she could have the artwork I was making. She said it was to be showcased at a gallery at the library. I said yes. I also asked if I’d get it back and I think she said no, so I was a little sad it went away, also. But she validated me as an artist. She validated what I created and thought it was good enough to show in public. Thank you so much, Ms. S.

I don’t think I was very good at art, but my love for it was pure. I made sure it stayed with me. I even worked at an art museum for a couple of years and the feeling of walking into a space of imagination and creativity never got old. I always felt that I was entering this halo of special-ness. Every new artist we featured had something to share. Yes, maybe a couple were a little bit of a stretch, but a lot of it had depth.

Below are a few videos of art that I really think is interesting and unique. I wish more people knew about what one can do with animation, ebru art and colored lights. The artist who created all this is the author of the light and color lab blog. He has opened up my eyes to a whole new form of art that isn’t traditional. I am most impressed with his animation skills. It takes so much care and patience to complete a good animation. If you like these, too, I’m sure he’d love the support!

turntable animation

explosion of neon color

neon ebru with oil

the star


my wish was granted before
the star fell down last night.

it leaped into the deepest ocean
lit in between the swirling seaweed.

constantly twinkling its pointed corners
moving from here to there.

upwards it flew towards the sky
having landed on the cool grass.

it illuminated the ground below
sprinkling golden dust of jewels.

went through the other side
from the earth’s deepest core.

seeing life through all possible angles
it considers where it was needed most.

to finally be free for just one night
and travel around giving us light.

color & design: photography and music videos

color blinds
“color blinds”

I think one of the most surprising things I learned about myself is that I really value design and color. They could be about anything; food presentation, home interiors, choreography and fashion. It’s silly to not know before, but now that I do, it seems so obvious. I did not have a desire to study graphic design or art academically. But I did for film production. I remember being a young critic on how films should have been directed. Or how I would notice all the little details on their set and the most random props. I don’t do this anymore, but I would be the kind of person who would watch a film and then re-watch with commentary from the director or the actors because I was fascinated with their viewpoint or thoughts on a scene. For fun, I would take photographs of buildings in strange angles or preferred to watch dance competitions as opposed to American Idol. Now that I think about it, maybe that was why I was so drawn to indie films. Although they are using traditional forms and processes of media, they present different and unique ways of doing them. They create visuals that are more interesting and memorable. They all kind of live for being imperfect in their way.

A few years ago, I experimented on color and light with a friend. I compiled edited footage of each experiment we did and made a short film.

And then I wondered, how many other videos are out there that have some really cool editing techniques? I used to spend so much time watching different music videos. Here are a few I thought were especially unique that used color or editing in interesting ways.


Kishi Bashi


In case you’re curious, here are some photographs from past color and light experiments. IMG_0987IMG_2981


Do you see the toilets?

going with the flow


I haven’t painted in so long. I’ve had mini sparks of inspiration here and there to get my supplies out and just start. But I always end up resisting it. Or I’m too lazy to actually do the work. The motivation in me to do things this week has dwindled down a lot compared to last week and the week before. I’m tired. My sleep has been suffering and I know deep down that’s probably the culprit to all this de-motivation. But why the no sleep?

Seeing this painting makes me really happy and proud. It no longer exists because I added more color afterwards that made it a whole new tone and painting entirely. The color was orange-red and it just made it more spicy. Here, it’s calmer. I remember creating this piece on a whatever, normal night at the apartment. I had painted a bit before; just playing as always. And I really liked the aquamarine color along with the cobalt blue. The wavy lines came out of my mood at the time. I had no care on how this painting turned out. I just wanted to paint.

I felt so inspired that I even posted it up with a poem on here. Here’s the post if you want to read it. The poem goes…

they say our lives will go into waves
they’ll dip down to the ocean floors
and shoot up to the stars
and ride on a shooting star.
and when a toddler points up
on a clear dark night,
he’ll see someone’s dream come true.
the white spaces in between
insulates us from the let down
of our traveling lives.
here comes a high one again,
i’ll catch you on the wave…

I used to be more of a “go with the flow” kind of person, but nowadays, I’m less so. It was fun to be that way, but in some ways, costly, wasteful and absent-minded of me. Well, wherever I end up going, I’ll always have this image to remind me of what really matters in life. Catch you on the next wave.