buzz

fly bee painting

I hear you, sir.
Flying about
Without any doubt.
Up and down
You make that sound.
Buzz. Buzz. Zzz.
What do you need?
Is it to be freed?
Here, the door is open
Go outside, then.

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donut reflections

donut reflections

I was making some art on MS Paint and realized, hey, I had a few thoughts. It’s written in the image above, but in case you can’t read it, here’s what I wrote:

everything has become a performance. things aren’t legitimate until there’s a brand name or a label or a degree. it feels staged. like i’m afraid to start anything because of the fear of not knowing what is validated or not. but why even care? i want to write. i want to create things. i want to bake cookies and i want to change the world for the better. i can do those things. you can do those things. we don’t need to be held back by some kind of standard we are trying to uphold or a title we need to define. i am human. you are human. can we just be humans again?

animation love

Animating is time-consuming. It takes a lot of heart and patience to see a project complete. I’ve only animated a couple of times and it is really hard. It is truly a step by step process in every movement that is being created. The difficulty, I think, lies in the patience for the repetitive process, and planning ahead.

In the video above, at the 38 second spot, you see a variety of these animated moving parts. It’s incredible what art we can create through these mediums. Movement speed, physics, geometry, color, and shapes all define this artwork. And then you see animated films and television shows come to life and it is remarkable what they can do.

first comment on youtube

I just got my first ever YouTube comment on a video I made about the calm life in Oahu, Hawaii. What a great surprise on Earth Day! I am so happy about it because it’s a video I made out of complete joy and inspiration for a trip I care so deeply about with full of nature, peace and beauty. The way life is there is so different from the way my life is here. I don’t get to wake up to a serene beach and full sunshine every day. I don’t see peacocks just walking around exploring freely. There isn’t much wildlife where I am at all, really.

And to see a comment means so much because it’s like a sign that this film matters more than just me; even if it’s just one person. So thank you, whoever you are, for making my day. I think this German YouTuber has a channel for decor diys. Check her out, if you’re interested—Deko Ideen mit Flora-Shop

perfection is boring

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Feb 14 2012 007

I’m not sure if it’s this new creative kick I’m on, but I sorta find perfection in the media boring lately. The sleekest photograph, the right pose, the smooth edits in video—I don’t feel as though there is anything to be learned or gained anymore. I want to push through the glossy, created beauty and see it for what it is.

This reminds me of an elementary school classmate I had who would consistently and carefully color within the lines in our coloring book every single time and I really wanted to be like that; to be neat and flawless. But now I feel that it’s just too much and I honestly never really succeeded in it. I always, somehow, color outside the lines despite my attempts.

I sometimes think that the way media works is in lows and highs; as many things I guess. Things come in cycles and people are always trying to evolve. But where do these new ideas come from and how, if ever, do they cycle in with the rest of it all? I know that I’ll return back to admiring well-done presentations because there is a craft, an art and a skill to appreciate and admire, but for now, I’m okay with things just being okay; not perfect.

for the love of art | light & color lab

I love art. Art will forever be a part of my livelihood as long as I can afford it, create it and embrace it. In grade school, I never really took art seriously. It was just something I had fun with and the classes at school made me happy. My art teacher from my elementary school is one of my most favorite teachers. Looking back at it now, she truly put a lot of effort, time, and money into these classes. I went to public school and if I am assuming correctly, the school did not have the funds for all the art supplies she provided. She taught my class fabric and basket weaving, clay art, painting, and even music and dance sometimes. I think the clay part was super interesting because it involved shaping, patience and a stove!

A memory I used to cherish so much as a child was when my art teacher went over to me and asked me if she could have the artwork I was making. She said it was to be showcased at a gallery at the library. I said yes. I also asked if I’d get it back and I think she said no, so I was a little sad it went away, also. But she validated me as an artist. She validated what I created and thought it was good enough to show in public. Thank you so much, Ms. S.

I don’t think I was very good at art, but my love for it was pure. I made sure it stayed with me. I even worked at an art museum for a couple of years and the feeling of walking into a space of imagination and creativity never got old. I always felt that I was entering this halo of special-ness. Every new artist we featured had something to share. Yes, maybe a couple were a little bit of a stretch, but a lot of it had depth.

Below are a few videos of art that I really think is interesting and unique. I wish more people knew about what one can do with animation, ebru art and colored lights. The artist who created all this is the author of the light and color lab blog. He has opened up my eyes to a whole new form of art that isn’t traditional. I am most impressed with his animation skills. It takes so much care and patience to complete a good animation. If you like these, too, I’m sure he’d love the support!

turntable animation

explosion of neon color

neon ebru with oil

the star

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my wish was granted before
the star fell down last night.

it leaped into the deepest ocean
lit in between the swirling seaweed.

constantly twinkling its pointed corners
moving from here to there.

upwards it flew towards the sky
having landed on the cool grass.

it illuminated the ground below
sprinkling golden dust of jewels.

went through the other side
from the earth’s deepest core.

seeing life through all possible angles
it considers where it was needed most.

to finally be free for just one night
and travel around giving us light.

color & design: photography and music videos

color blinds
“color blinds”

I think one of the most surprising things I learned about myself is that I really value design and color. They could be about anything; food presentation, home interiors, choreography and fashion. It’s silly to not know before, but now that I do, it seems so obvious. I did not have a desire to study graphic design or art academically. But I did for film production. I remember being a young critic on how films should have been directed. Or how I would notice all the little details on their set and the most random props. I don’t do this anymore, but I would be the kind of person who would watch a film and then re-watch with commentary from the director or the actors because I was fascinated with their viewpoint or thoughts on a scene. For fun, I would take photographs of buildings in strange angles or preferred to watch dance competitions as opposed to American Idol. Now that I think about it, maybe that was why I was so drawn to indie films. Although they are using traditional forms and processes of media, they present different and unique ways of doing them. They create visuals that are more interesting and memorable. They all kind of live for being imperfect in their way.

A few years ago, I experimented on color and light with a friend. I compiled edited footage of each experiment we did and made a short film.

And then I wondered, how many other videos are out there that have some really cool editing techniques? I used to spend so much time watching different music videos. Here are a few I thought were especially unique that used color or editing in interesting ways.

Chvrches

Kishi Bashi

Coldplay

In case you’re curious, here are some photographs from past color and light experiments. IMG_0987IMG_2981

 

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Do you see the toilets?

going with the flow

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I haven’t painted in so long. I’ve had mini sparks of inspiration here and there to get my supplies out and just start. But I always end up resisting it. Or I’m too lazy to actually do the work. The motivation in me to do things this week has dwindled down a lot compared to last week and the week before. I’m tired. My sleep has been suffering and I know deep down that’s probably the culprit to all this de-motivation. But why the no sleep?

Seeing this painting makes me really happy and proud. It no longer exists because I added more color afterwards that made it a whole new tone and painting entirely. The color was orange-red and it just made it more spicy. Here, it’s calmer. I remember creating this piece on a whatever, normal night at the apartment. I had painted a bit before; just playing as always. And I really liked the aquamarine color along with the cobalt blue. The wavy lines came out of my mood at the time. I had no care on how this painting turned out. I just wanted to paint.

I felt so inspired that I even posted it up with a poem on here. Here’s the post if you want to read it. The poem goes…

they say our lives will go into waves
they’ll dip down to the ocean floors
and shoot up to the stars
and ride on a shooting star.
and when a toddler points up
on a clear dark night,
he’ll see someone’s dream come true.
the white spaces in between
insulates us from the let down
of our traveling lives.
here comes a high one again,
i’ll catch you on the wave…

I used to be more of a “go with the flow” kind of person, but nowadays, I’m less so. It was fun to be that way, but in some ways, costly, wasteful and absent-minded of me. Well, wherever I end up going, I’ll always have this image to remind me of what really matters in life. Catch you on the next wave.

a day to love

love is there

Long gone are the days in which I’d idolize the suave British actor or the sweet, yet flawed teen heartthrob. I have come a long way. We all have. Relationships can be complicated and layered and I think media makes it very easy to ignore the harder parts. But I also think the joyful, deeply meaningful aspects of love are also missing their mark in our purview of mainstream media. Oh, but then there’s YouTube where real people showcase their real lives each day, so maybe it’s more realistic? I’m not sure. What I do know is, I used to think that romantic love, specifically, was black and white. Two people in love is easy. Hence, the drawing below, salt and pepper belong together, end of story.

Salt and Pepper
Salt and Pepper = best friends love

But then suddenly, something real happens. Reading Alexa Chung’s account on love is amusing and nostalgic. I agree with her in that love is sort of out of our control sometimes.

A few years ago in an interview I was asked to describe what love feels like, and for me at the time it was a matter of fact: “Love feels like there is nothing you can do about it.” I was younger then – and smugger – but even on the other side of it, I believe that statement to be true.

– Alexa Chung On The Highs (And Lows) Of Young Love, Vogue

I used to admire couples so much and I had faith I’d have such a thing as well. I wasn’t annoyed by them at all. I thought they shared something so special and it was something to be celebrated for. Having had first-hand experience, I can honestly say, it is something rather unique, meaningful and valuable. We all should celebrate love. I do not agree with the marketing trickery that comes along with Valentine’s Day, but I do think it is rather important to value the relationships you have in your lives; whether it’s romantic or not and especially if the message isn’t sent and received each day. No need for huge gestures of what the day may stand for; just a simple, “I love you” or “I care about you” will do. <3

teenage love

youth hormones formulate
trials and experiments
with love invested inwards
feelings placed up
reality kicks it back down
heart and body reactions
unseen forces gripped tight
no straight paths
only through and around

chemical reaction

Why d’ya have to be so cute?
It’s impossible to ignore you
Must you make me laugh so much
It’s bad enough we get along so well
Say goodnight and go
– imogen heap, goodnight and go

 

Somebody broke me once
Love was a currency
A shimmering balance act
I think that I laughed at that
-bleachers, don’t take the money

 

music therapy

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it’s the piano keys hitting the downer notes. it’s the guitar that strums along with the beat. it’s the lyrics that dance along the melodies. it’s the meaning behind all the words; every single letter that created the masterpiece. i used to live in this bubble of misconception that what i listened to defined who i was. and in some ways it does, but not anymore. to me, it’s a lot about how i’m feeling. a lover of mine said that to me. that’s how he listens. he hears the music that defines how he feels. i got it then, but i can feel that now. there are so many ways in which we can cope with whatever we’re going through, but music can uniquely somehow speak for what our hearts are saying. i’ve learned about new artists and songs by just going with how i feel as opposed to what i think i should be listening to.

my heart has been saying a lot lately and it’s hard to describe it to others. it’s communicated through my eyes and my actions. it’s through the ways in which i show my gratitude and love. it’s how i say nothing at all. i learned through my parents that actions are much louder than words. all of our definitions of love aren’t quite the same, but we all sort of know when it comes to us.

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love heals

butterfly petals

butterfly petals

I don’t think butterfly petals is their official name. I don’t know the name of this flower at all. It was so eye-catching though. They were so perfect, they looked like they were made by hand; a controlled and intentional creation. But rather, they stemmed from nature. Grown from a blueprint unseen and unpredictable. I would always want these butterflies free. Never bound and always floating, as they should be.

fly away
as far as you can
or stay
on a single petal
for as long as you want
be free
feel free
bloom nature’s origami
butterfly statues
velvet to touch
fragile as silk
resiliently invincible

clarity

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we sat on the rocks. early morning trying to catch the sunrise. we drove in it as we drove by it getting here. we weren’t disappointed though because we’ve seen so many. it never gets old chasing the sun. it’s too beautiful and you just feel like the whole world is greater than whatever worry’s occupying your mind. we talked about our fears at the moment. wondering if we’d ever catch our dreams and if time could heal whatever it is making the whole world so broken lately.

i saw the ripples move in and away. the wind was pretty steady. so grateful i brought an extra layer of clothing. it let me sit a little while longer. there were two major rippling patterns. one went to the right and there was a mini one hitting it at an angle. it made me think that no matter how solid your path is or the wave you’re riding, there can be a little one just angling you away. some waves made it through okay, but some got completely off course and disappeared.

it’s okay though because they ended up being on another track. just like we do. we get on a wave and then get knocked out sometimes. we get up and get on another. then we ride along until we get to where we need to go. maybe we’ll meet our fears along the way. maybe we’ll make friends with it. and maybe it’ll all be one someday and everything makes sense.

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